is it me?
its been bothering me for some time now its been eating at me what is it about me that makes me unemployable?
why doesnt anyone respond to my emails?
why do they always say "we will get back to you" and N E V E R do?
ive applied to over 500 jobs since august 2005
ive had under 15 interviews
and
no offers
am i too ugly to work there ? is usually my first thought
followed by
what did i say wrong?
what did i do wrong?
did i smell?
was i dressed too casual or too business?
it was my fault
but was it?
i dont think i did anything
in fact on over half of those interviews the interviewer seemed to like me to like what i said to like my qualifications it doesnt add up
then i hear Madonnas voice "do i have to change my name? will it get me far? should i loose some weight?"
ahhhhha
i have experience, experience with people, with helping people, with organizing people,with management or people and thing, with administrative things, with communicating, with writing, with money, with computer, with kids/teens with with with ALOT and i have a BACHELORS DEGREE which honeslty doesnt seem to mean ANYTHING for me, Ive even considered pretending i didnt have one to see if that helped...
just for the record i have meet or gone above the requirements for 85% of the jobs i applied to/for
it just makes me sick
makes my stomach turn
makes my head hurt
i don't know how much longer i can keep this up
keep trying
keep doing anything
and
all i can continue to wonder is :
is it me?
did i cause this?
what bad horrible thing did i do to deserve this?
havent i FUCKING suffered enough?
i know i have
i pretty much suffered since birth
just about
suffered everday for 23 and 1/2 years
maybe a total of 22 years
which is still like 90% of my life
why do i suffer?
is there a god
and is he or she horribly mad at me?
i need answer
i need to know why
why this is happening
and
why to me?
i cant help but think if i knew why then id be able to remedy the problem
why doesnt anyone respond to my emails?
why do they always say "we will get back to you" and N E V E R do?
ive applied to over 500 jobs since august 2005
ive had under 15 interviews
and
no offers
am i too ugly to work there ? is usually my first thought
followed by
what did i say wrong?
what did i do wrong?
did i smell?
was i dressed too casual or too business?
it was my fault
but was it?
i dont think i did anything
in fact on over half of those interviews the interviewer seemed to like me to like what i said to like my qualifications it doesnt add up
then i hear Madonnas voice "do i have to change my name? will it get me far? should i loose some weight?"
ahhhhha
i have experience, experience with people, with helping people, with organizing people,with management or people and thing, with administrative things, with communicating, with writing, with money, with computer, with kids/teens with with with ALOT and i have a BACHELORS DEGREE which honeslty doesnt seem to mean ANYTHING for me, Ive even considered pretending i didnt have one to see if that helped...
just for the record i have meet or gone above the requirements for 85% of the jobs i applied to/for
it just makes me sick
makes my stomach turn
makes my head hurt
i don't know how much longer i can keep this up
keep trying
keep doing anything
and
all i can continue to wonder is :
is it me?
did i cause this?
what bad horrible thing did i do to deserve this?
havent i FUCKING suffered enough?
i know i have
i pretty much suffered since birth
just about
suffered everday for 23 and 1/2 years
maybe a total of 22 years
which is still like 90% of my life
why do i suffer?
is there a god
and is he or she horribly mad at me?
i need answer
i need to know why
why this is happening
and
why to me?
i cant help but think if i knew why then id be able to remedy the problem
no one likes me do they?
Posted by
jOs |
3/13/2006 10:25 AM